Heartfelt Listening

Sitting in a hospital lab waiting to get a blood test I needed for my chaplaincy internship this afternoon, the Lord chose to bless me through the life of a stranger.  A tall, attractive black woman, probably about my age came in with a nurse.  The nurse was explaining that this was where she would get her blood work and then further down the hall was where she would get her CAT scan and x-ray.  She patted her hand and said that everything would be alright and she left. 

As the woman turned and walked toward the chair next to me I could tell she was overwhelmed.  I smiled at her and said hello.  She smiled, sat down, and sighed a very deep and layered sigh.  “It sounds like you’re having a rough day,” I said.  She looked at me and seemed thankful I had spoken to her.  “It’s been unbelievable,” she said.  “So far, I’ve had an EKG and an MRI, and now I’m getting lab work, a CAT scan, and then an X-ray.  Then on July 15^th they are taking out half of one of my lungs.  They found a spot and told me I have cancer.  I just can’t believe it.”

She needed to talk and I was there.  “I’ve never smoked,” she said.  She wept a little and she held onto me with her eyes.  I was just there.  I listened.  I let her know that I heard her heart and not just her words.

And then they called my name.  “Debra.” 

“Just a minute,” I said.  The lab tech could wait.   “I would like to pray for you if you don’t mind.  What’s your first name?”  I asked.  “Emma," she said.  "Would you do that?”  So I took a moment and prayed with her.  She squeezed my hand and thanked me.  We smiled with our eyes and I told her I would keep her in my prayers and to take care of herself.

And so my time as a chaplain began before it started.  And I was blessed.

Listening for the Heartbeat of God   by John Philip Newell

One of the most precious teachings in the Celtic Christian world is the memory of John the Beloved leaning against Jesus at the Last Supper.  It was said of him that he therefore heard the heartbeat of God.  He became a symbol of the practice of listening—listening deep within ourselves, listening deep within one another, listening deep within the body of the earth for the beat of the Holy.  Do we know, each one of us, that we are bearers of the sacred beat of life?  Do we know that we can honor that beat in one another and in all things?  And do we know that it is this combination—of knowing that we are bearers of Presence and of choosing to honor the Presence in one another—that holds the key to transformation in our lives and world?

To listen for the heartbeat of God is to listen both within the vastness of the universe and within the intimacy of our own hearts.  And it is to know these distinct ways of listening as essentially one, as two aspects of the same posture of consciousness.  The deeper we move in the mystery of our soul, the closer we come to hearing the beat of the cosmos; and the more we expand our awareness into the vastness of the universe, the closer we come to knowing the unbounded Presence at the heart of our being and every being.

Excerpts from A New Harmony: The Spirit, the Earth and the Human Soul.  San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2011.